just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize