I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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