you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
