Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize