just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
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