I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize