I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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