I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
