TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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