The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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