he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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