I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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