Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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