I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
