i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
it glows. i had to have it.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
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