Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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