So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
where are you?
Hypothermia
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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