No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
