sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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