Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
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I think I have vodka in my lungs
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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