You were right. It hurts to walk today.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
