Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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