This show inspires me to have sex in space
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
