i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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