I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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