R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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