idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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