if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
a search helicopter?!
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
