Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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