So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
