is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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