She's JV to your varsity
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
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Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
you made out with another girl for some wings
If I die, sorry about rent.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize