Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize