If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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