I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize