I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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