i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
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I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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