Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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