considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
