She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
