So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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