If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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