sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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