Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
