if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
