I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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