Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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