During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
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