Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(209): View more from California

do you want me to make hamburgers?

(541): View more from Oregon

i'm vegan

(209): View more from California

i'll put lettuce on them

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(330): View more from Ohio

Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.

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(773): View more from Illinois

he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...

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(408): View more from California

just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".

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(949): View more from California

Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.

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