You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
he thought i was a dude.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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