im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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