I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring